Alive and Kicking...I Think!

Yes...I am still alive, barely, but still alive and kicking. This month has been crazy and I haven't had a moment to blog...or when I do, I am tired and choose bonding with my couch and DVR over blogging. I've also had so much running around in my head that I don't seem to be focused enough to blog. We've also been socially active which doesn't happen too often as much as it did this month.

We celebrated D's birthday to begin the month. Again, I took us to Seau's Legends Party. It is so much fun...a party complete for $55 per person which included food from a variety of San Diego restaurants, free gaming, dancing and other entertainment. It is attended by a variety of local and national sports celebrities. Last year, we had the fortune to meet Dermontti Dawson who played with the Pittsburgh Steelers. He is so nice and spent lots of time talking to us and hanging out. This year, we ran into him again and spent a long time with him at the blackjack table. We had quite the laugh over the girls trying to hit on him (he's married)and took pictures with us.


Before the craziness


After the craziness

The next night was actually D's birthday. We took him to dinner at the family favorite (Ruth's Chris) and had a great night. I think D actually had a good time and was touched by the family.

The next weekend was our annual All Greek reunion. Once again, I was designated driver for the evening. I am still amazed after all these years (5 to be exact) that women can get together and have a drink and be civil. Whereas, the men (fraternity boys) all act like they're back in college. It's funny to watch...especially D taking shots and being hungover the next morning! I ran into the one (former) friend that pushed me to make my resolution of losing those friends who do nothing, but bring me down. She said hello and gave me a hug and said nothing else to me the rest of the evening. I think I got the hello and hug just because I was with a group of people she wanted to say hello to. It felt fine...I guess I've made a huge step regarding that resolution!

The jay oh bee is good and I am still cautiously optimistic about the situation. New boss is so different and keeps pulling me into things that I was never involved with before. I feel good about things...I have an interview on Wednesday for her former position. I'm feeling like I'm in a potentially win-win situation...if I stay, it's good, but if I get this promotion, it's also good. She has been encouraging and shared that she doesn't want me to leave, but understands that I need to do what is best for my career. The other upside about the promotion is that it would move me closer to realizing some of my dreams.

I'm really trying to take things one step at a time rather than looking at big pictures. When I do, I can feel it throw me into a small tizzy! It's all a process...have a great day!

I'm Alive...Just Lagging

I am seriously lagging in tbe blog post area...in fact, once I upload photos, I am planning on doing a "While the Cat's Away" post. For some reason, I can't seem to get myself straight right now. I'm busy, but not so much that I can't sit down for a few minutes and blog. For the most part, things are good and progressing...

Jay Oh Bee: Old boss' last day was Thursday. It was an odd day around here with a weird mood. New boss started on Monday. Since old boss left, it's been oddly friendly around these parts. I'm cautiously optimistic and happy, but still worried that I am being lulled into a false sense of security and that my body will end up in a dumpster. New boss brings a whole different energy and vibe to the office. She is positive and funny...we met this morning and had a great talk about things. She's asked me to attend a regional meeting with her next week and is getting me involved with things that I should be. I think that we will make a good team. I'm also working on the application for her old position just to see if I can make the next step in my career. We'll see what happens...

Life: Things are just busy in our lives...D was gone for a long weekend with the boys and it threw us out of whack. The next few weeks are going to be busy with events (D's birthday, All Greek reunion and so much more) that I almost feel like I need to take a day off and spend it at home to clean and organize.

Well...I hope life is good for everyone! Take care!

4 Day Weekend into 3 Day Work Week!

I love 3 day weekends and this one was no exception...

• Friday: After work, we decided to take care of getting tires for the SUV. Originally, this was going to be a tax refund project, but since D is driving to Arizona in it this week, it moved up the priority list. We went to Mission Valley Costco with the idea of killing time at Ikea during installation. WRONG! Poway (and Albuquerque) had our tires, so we headed north to Poway. The good thing about this Costco is that it is not usually busy. We placed our tire order and were told it would be ready around closing time (8:30) which meant almost 2 hours of time to kill. My Friday sleepy (and hungry) mindset was not digging this idea, but after some samples, time flew. We only bought one thing after wandering down every (and I mean every) aisle...D bought me a taste of Spain cookbook. We got lucky and our installation was done at 8:00. Then, D took me to Seau's for dinner...he called it our pre Valentine's dinner.
• Saturday: Because we had bought tires for 2 (yes 2) cars in one week, we also had the expense of getting them aligned. So, off we went to the alignment center. After dropping both cars off, we walked to IHOP for breakfast. Apparently, everyone decided to do a Vday breakfast at IHOP...I have never seen it so crowded. After a nice breakfast together, we picked up the cars and went off on our errands for the day (haircut for D, last stop for D's supplies for Arizona, and Iowa Meat Farms). At Iowa Meats, we picked up our Vday dinner...marinated tri-tip. The rest of the evening was dinner (tri-tip, Caesar salad and garlic mashed potatoes)...we even broke out the big Mikasa balloon glasses...and spent some quality time together.
• Sunday: We got up with all intentions of going for a walk, but after breakfast at Tip Top Meats in Carlsbad, it didn't happen. Instead, we drove out to 4S Ranch and shopped at World Market (so much I want there) and their amazing Ralphs for some groceries. After trekking through the county, we made it home for some more relaxation. Dinner was more from Iowa Meats (Italian herb marinated kabobs) and pasta with homemade pesto.
• Monday: D had to run and meet someone to exchange stuff and I decided to stay in. I looked outside and saw the pouring rain and wanted no part in it. While he was out, I was quite the homemaker. I marinated chicken for dinner, baked some monster chocolate chip pecan cookies and made lasagna rolls for another night's dinner. It made it nice and cozy. I even got to talk to Cousin Cleveland and catch up with him. It was nice to catch up with him since I haven't talked to him for a while.

This week is kind of a mellow week at work...it's Ski Week or February recess for the schools. District office staff has Monday and Friday holidays this week...two 3-day weekends in a row for me...Sweet! Plus, since we're basically closed, it's comfy clothes (jeans) everyday. Today, new boss is here...she took us to lunch as a start to our time together. Speaking of new boss, she mentioned that she saw that I have a FB account because of the District network...this was weird for me. I guess it doesn't bother me as much since my profile is private and I don't post inappropriately. Anyways, D leaves after work for his boys Spring Training weekend in Arizona. Except for some things scheduled, I'm looking forward to some me time and maybe some house cleaning (yuck!) that really needs to be done. Have a great day!

Happy Early V Day!

Because I'm not sure what the rest of today and tomorrow holds as far as time, I decided to blog a little about V Day! I was (and still am) a believer that Valentines Day is just an overrated Hallmark holiday. I've always thought that if the person I was with couldn't tell me how much they love me on the other 364 days of the year, then he shouldn't waste money on overpriced flowers and other things. I've also had some pretty bad Valentines Days...most notable, in college when I hosted a single girl Vday party. A girl I knew casually came and we all lamented about our boy issues. I talked at length about a boy that I liked and we were trying to figure out where we stood. I found out a few days later that this girl and the boy I liked had started dating (she had a 1st date with him on the 15th). I was crushed! Then, most recently, on our 1st Vday together, we had a terrible night and then fight that caused us to take a "break" for 2 weeks. It was awful!

Since then, I fell in love with an amazing man in spite of our early Vday trauma. We now make it a point to stay home, make dinner and just make it our special place for the evening. I realize that the commercialism of Vday is what you make of it. Instead, for me, it's a reminder of how lucky I am to be in love and have someone who loves me. So, to my friends, happy Valentine's Day! May every day be filled with love! And to D, the love of my life, happy Valentine's Day! I love you lots and lots!

Back to Blogging!

Long time, no blogging. I've had so much happening in the last few weeks with lots of jumbled thoughts that I haven't had the drive to put it into writing. I also feel, sometimes, that my blog is about a whole lot of nothing...basically, things that no one wants to read except me. But, in keeping with the 2009 list, I'm back to blog.

• I didn't get the jay oh bee and am okay with it. Except for the look of disdain from the Nastys when I was commended for my drive and knowledge, I've gotten nothing, but positive encouraging responses from everyone around me. I am a firm believer in "right place right time" philosophy and am pretty sure there is a reason that this didn't work out.
• I reconnected with some friends from high school last week. We found each other on Facebook as we prepare for our 20 (yikes!) year reunion. We had so much fun catching up and even closed the restaurant. Some of us have changed and some of us are the same. It was fun to hear about our lives up to this point.
• I spent last weekend at home and did a whole bunch of nothing! D and I did some errands on Friday after work, but once I got home, I never left until Monday morning for work. I didn't even get mail or take trash out. I spent a lot of time with the couch and relaxing. I think after the week I'd had, I needed the serious veg time.
• I've been trying to focus on all the positives in my life, but still get sucked into the "what I don't have" complex. I understand the path idea, but sometimes it's hard for me to not be overwhelmed and depressed by things.
• I had a talk with the new boss D2. I saw her at a staff development day conference last week. She asked me how things were going and I laid it out to her. I hadn't intended doing it until she got here, but she asked and I couldn't waste the chance. She was in shock at some of the things I said...she said that things would be different from her last time at the District...she was coming back in a totally different capacity. She also told me that we were going to be working very close together and I would be her right hand. While talking to her, I really tried to assess if she was just telling me what I wanted to her or was honest. I really felt like she listened to me and it made her accountable coming into this situation. At the end of the conversation, I felt such a relief that I wanted to cry. Someone actually listened to me and is going to do something. Since then, I've talked to her each workday and she is in the office today...her official start date isn't until March 2.
• After the talk with D2, I am a little conflicted. I am still going to apply for her position (good starting place for me). I also feel (as of today) that staying in my current job will allow me to gain some additional knowledge and really do my job.
• I talked to soon to be retired boss last week...kind of our last debrief. He apologized ("My bad") for not getting me involved in certain things. I think that a lot of our office issues are his responsibility and his lack of action created this monster.
• I've been dragging myself to the gym even when I've been dog tired. It helps and makes me feel like all the excuses I make are lame. Last night, I wanted to switch it up and took a turbo kick boxing class. I felt totally uncoordinated for most of the class, but kicked butt in the workout. I've noticed my clothes being looser and my face not being as full.

I think this year has become the year of finding my inner voice and realizing that I am a pretty phenomenal person. It's also become a confidence boosting time for me...I really feel like I'm pulling myself through the negativity I've harbored for myself and making some real positive changes. Here to a continued path in 2009!

Wee...Stop this Rollercoaster!

So, the last few days has been quite the roller coaster of emotion...from the highs to the lows and everything in between. I am so dog tired from this today, I'm trying to keep my head up, eyes open and from hitting my desk. I'm thinking a lunchtime power nap may be in order.

Saturday was the baby shower of two friends. Normally, I detest all things shower related, but this was one of the best times I've had. It was so much fun to talk and catch up with a group of women who are all in similar places. It's also nice to know that in this crazy life there are people who are my support and can make me laugh...thanks girls! The rest of the day was pretty mellow and included me watching "the red carpet premiere" (Lifetime's words, not mine) of Prayers for Bobby. It was good and thought provoking, but I'm not sure that it was worth me wasting 2 hours of my time.

Sunday morning was an odd one at home...I think we were both in funky moods and it took some time for that to normalize. After running some errands, we decided to go for a walk in Carlsbad. We parked on Carlsbad Village Drive, walked down to the beach and all the way to the Power Plant before heading back. We think it was close to a 3 mile walk. We stopped for a snack before making some other stops. Sunday night at home was spent prepping for Monday and relaxing.

Monday was a VERY long day that began with me leaving at 7:00 for work and return at midnight from the day. The morning started with some drama with an interview panel that was solved pretty quickly. And then, at 11:50 a.m., I had my interview. I felt better prepared for this and had done some good thinking thanks to a director emailing me some feedback and things to think about and prepare for the interview. The interview was our 3 commissioners and the Associate Superintendent. It was a little intimidating to lay out my experience, but the biggest question knocked me for a loop..."Since you work for us, you have a slight advantage and know the situation. Tell us about what needs to be addressed in your department. Please feel free to be candid and know that anything you say in here will be held in the strictest confidence." My first thoughts ranged from "do you have the rest of the day? if I say it, am I sabotaging myself?" I had thought a lot about this issue and figured that it might come up at some point, so I was prepared to answer in a professional manner without emotion. At the end of the interview, I thanked them for their time and mentioned that I hope I wasn't too candid. Their response was that this was the time to be candid. On my way back to my office, I stopped and did a debrief with the director who sent me feedback. Talking to her, I reaffirmed my true feelings about the outcome. Regardless, if it's me or someone else, things are going to change and for the best. By participating in this process, I was able to get myself noticed professionally and there are opportunities for me to grow either in a new position or in my current position.

So, as if that wasn't enough, the boss' retirement party was that afternoon. The Nastys did all the work and never included us in any of the plans. As I saw the party (and how tacky it was), I started feeling emotional. Then, during the presentation of the bell ( a district retirement tradition), our boss made a speech. He called the 4 of us up and proceeded to thank each of us individually in front of those gathered. It was overwhelming and unexpected. At the end of the party, we banded together to get everything cleaned up.

At this point, I wanted to go home and have a drink and relax, but wait, there's more to my day. Monday was the first meeting of the new semester with the new officers for the Chapter. Typically, this is the longest meeting of the semester. I made it to San Marcos just before the 6:00 exec meeting thinking I could grab something to eat there. Wrong! My choices for food was a convenience store full of prepackaged sandwiches (none of which appealed to me) and chips. I chose Munchies snack mix and a Snapple to tide me over. The new exec seems to be so on top of things already. I am hoping for a great year with no drama. After lots of meeting segments, I finally left San Marcos at 11:30 and got home at midnight. I was hungry, but the thought of late night fast food did not appeal to me (who am I?!?). Instead, I snacked on some remnants in the fridge. I think I crawled into bed around 12:30 a.m.

Somehow, I am up and at work this morning. The last few days has been quite the roller coaster of emotion and will continue for the rest of the week. I should hear something regarding a decision within the week. Back to work now...have a good day!

Tuesday Progress Report!

Happy Tuesday! It was very nice to have yesterday off to accomplish a few things including going to the gym (alone), catching up with the new president, and making (at D's request) a pretty darn good cream of mushroom soup for dinner last night. In fact, I continue to roll on with my little accomplishments with some hiccups along the way. The latest updates:

• Jay Oh Bee: After much trepidation and hesitation while being sick, I managed to get my application done and submitted for the boss's job. This morning, after more nervousness, I went through the first round of interviews. Honestly, I don't know that this is the right job for me, but I decided to go through the process for some more practice. Also, someone I trust here at work talked to me about this change and what it could mean for me. She also told me that no one knows I'm interested if I don't express my interest. As a coincidence (or not), she was on one of the panels and managed to make me feel good and proud of my accomplishments. I'll see what happens and have put it into a higher power's hands.
• Housing Dreams: Sunday morning, D and I drove around some neighborhoods looking at houses. While we are not quite there yet, it refocused our intentions.
• Gym Attendance: We made an effort and went to the gym last week and then, I went on my own yesterday. I feel like I am hitting the stride by heading to the gym. Granted, it still is not my favorite thing to do, but it is a great way to release some of this pent up energy.
• D and I went on a date on Saturday...actually, it was a double date. One of D's friends from Utah is in a master's program in San Bernardino and needed a break. He and his girlfriend, Irena, came down. So, the four of us went to dinner at the Turf Supper Club and then, Extraordinary Desserts. Sunday morning, the four of us had breakfast at Pipes. It was fun and happened in spite of my pouty mood all day on Saturday.

All in all, things are good and seem to be progressing. Take care!